(Author’s note: This is the fourth and final post about emotional baggage. We recommend reading the first three before beginning this one.)
Meet Cynthia
How does emotional baggage work as we move through our daily life? To answer that, we will look at a fictional person named, Cynthia, whose challenges are similar to those we have seen over the years. We’ll go into some detail about her, followed by a walkthrough of her day’s events. Then, we’ll look at the happenings of that day from the hidden causes created by subconscious beliefs and emotional baggage.
Cynthia is a 29-year-old single professional woman who knows what she wants in life. She is intelligent, determined, organized and competent. She is most often to-the-point in conversations but tempers that with a soft sense of humor that is sometimes a little self-critical. She is spiritually focused, meditates daily and enjoys her weekend Yoga class.
Authentic friendships are a must, as they bring a sense of increased fulfillment, contentment and joy in her life. However, she only has one or two trusted friends that are part of her inner circle; they are the ones that she can share her intimate dreams and concerns, and who she feels safe to ask their opinions on the most delicate of matters.
Finding her best friend and soulmate is important, but has eluded her. She routinely manages to find someone who initially appears to have the qualities she seeks, that also seems to be spiritually focused and possesses a strength of character she needs in a life partner. So far, these relationships have always ended up being short-lived.
Although they were all good men, in time, she discovered that they each had a more of a traditional earthly focus than she thought, plus some negative habits she detests — like excessive focus on sports, drinking, an odd temperament, working long hours, and the like. Some of her friends have marriages to such men, which is something she definitely wants to avoid.
Although she remains hopeful in finding someone to share her life with, Cynthia is beginning to wonder if he even exists. They all seem to be like a mirage, initially appearing to be wonderful then later fading to disappointment, sometimes quite quickly.
The Childhood
Cynthia had a troubled childhood, with a family life where feelings and praise were rarely shared. She worked hard to gain her father’s approval, but never felt like she met his expectations. He rarely gave praise, but was more than able to share his disappointment. Her mother had her own life-issues, which meant she was emotionally and mentally unable to be there for Cynthia and her brother. They were on their own.
The Present
To this day, she has a low sense of self-worth and a tendency toward self-sabotage, although she doesn’t believe that is what happens. Mysteriously, things seem to go wrong from time to time, exactly at the worst moment. Inwardly, she feels unworthy of recognition and praise, but this is exactly what she desperately seeks from others and in all areas of interaction within her life. Her childhood experiences undoubtedly led her to being so organized, focused and determined in everything she does.
If asked, she would say that she has a pretty positive self-image, but has things to work on “just like everyone else.”
The Day Begins
Cynthia wakes up at 5:30am, right on schedule. She immediately walks out, turns on the coffee maker to heat the water for her morning tea. As usual, she goes into the living room to meditate for 20-30 minutes to get centered, grounded and spiritually connected with her day. Afterward, she continues with her routine.
She then prepares a cup of tea and lets it steep for a few minutes. Afterward, she pulls the bag out of the cup, only to have it slip from her fingers and fall onto the saucer. “Damn,” she says, as the green tea splatters and stains her flowered, indigo-colored blouse. It is the one she specifically picked out for the “special” weekly office meeting with the store manager.
This is the meeting where she hopes to get a promotion and pay raise that she has waited for a long time. She has worked harder than anyone else and feels she deserves that promotion ahead of her two coworkers, who spend more time talking with one another than they do helping customers.
After quickly doing some expert stain removal on her apparel, she grabs her healthy breakfast bar and heads out the door.
The Commute
Traffic is always a problem, but today she can’t afford to be late! Unfortunately, she left 10 minutes after her normal 6:45am departure, due to the tea stain fiasco. Normally, she would arrive at work 15 minutes early during normal traffic conditions.
As luck would have it, today someone had a flat tire, causing all the cars to slow down as they passed. Although she knows there is nothing she can do about this situation, she begins to feel frustrated and a little angry. “Of all days!” she thinks to herself.
The Meeting
Cynthia arrives at exactly 8am, precisely when the meeting with her boss, who’s also the store owner, was to begin. She darts in the door, drops off her purse and coat at her desk and tries to enter the meeting as casually as possible.
Her two coworkers were already seated. Her boss looks at her with a question-mark stare, then asks if she brought the report with her that they had talked about yesterday. Cynthia then remembers that the report is sitting on her desk, unduplicated. She graciously excuses herself from the meeting, grabs the report and makes three copies before returning.
Her two coworkers look at her with a smile, as she sits back down. They had been making every effort to take advantage of this situation during her brief absence.
As her boss goes over the business report with them, she wonders to herself, “Did I just blow it? Is this a year’s worth of hard work smashed to pieces because of a dropped tea bag?”
The remainder of the meeting goes pretty well, but her boss doesn’t announce the promotion at its conclusion as she previously said she would. Cynthia becomes worried, but maintains her demeanor.
Cynthia knows the store owner well. She is a professional woman herself and expects everyone to model similar behavior at all times. She’s tough! More than a few employees over the years have experienced the “strike-one and you are out” routine.
Later that afternoon, the store owner informs Cynthia of her promotion, but with a muted comment that reflects her disappointment in her tardiness and not having the sales report ready for everyone.
The Date
After an emotionally exhausting day at work, she was ready to have dinner with Ken.
She got the promotion and pay raise! Things are looking up!
She had met Ken at Target while shopping for a birthday card for her brother. He came across as being a really nice guy, and seemed to be able to read her mind!
He spoke of his spiritual focus, how he liked to meditate with some friends, as well as his love of nature and the outdoors. “Wow, is this guy for real?” she thought to herself. They both hit it off and set this dinner date.
They were scheduled to meet at 7pm at the local Italian restaurant. It specializes in gluten-free pasta for all of their menu items, which is a must for Cynthia. Unfortunately, Ken showed up 10 minutes late, with an explanation that he had forgotten his wallet. “Here we go, again?” she thinks to herself.
Soon, all of her concerns are forgotten. Ken is as warm and charming as he was at the store, even more so!
The dinner date continues to go extremely well until Cynthia asks him about meditating. She is curious about where he learned how to meditate and whether it was a specific type, like Kundalini Yoga or Zen Mediation? Ken tells her “Zen Meditation,” but seemed to know little about it. He also doesn’t know much about the local park that he said he visits on a regular basis.
Even with Ken’s shortcomings, he still seemed like a pretty nice guy. His warm, soothing voice and calm, caring demeanor are characteristics she really finds attractive. It warms her heart! Plus, he is mildly cute. Still, she began to have that familiar feeling once more.
After dinner, Ken expressed interest in seeing her again and asks her on another date for the following Friday. She reluctantly says, “Okay,” but nothing else. She is hoping, against her better judgment, there was more depth to him than what it seems.
Back Home
Cynthia arrives home just before 10pm. She is guardedly happy about her promotion.
She really enjoys working at the store and doesn’t want to look for a different job or change employers. At the same time, she knows that her lateness to this crucial meeting cost her some confidence with her boss, who she wishes weren’t the store owner.
She’s also knows that she is in a situation that will likely not change, since the store has been in the same family for three generations. The boss isn’t going anywhere. Cynthia begins to wonder with some sadness, “Should she?”
Then her thoughts drift to ponder the last two “significant others” she has dated. Unfortunately, neither relationship evolved to the point where they were thought of as a steady partner.
“Where’s my best friend?” she laments. She thinks how each of those relationships started out so well then slowly faded into disillusionment once their true nature and real intentions were revealed.
Is Ken going to be Part III?” she thinks to herself as she gets ready for bed.
Finally, she slips under the covers and sets the alarm to go off 15 minutes earlier than normal. Cynthia knows that the boss will be watching her closely for quite a while. It took three months for her boss to get over the time she accidentally undercharged a client-business invoice a mere hundred dollars. And that was four years ago.
She wonders, “Why can’t I have a nice boss like my best friend, Janey?” as she slowly falls asleep.
Cynthia’s Subconscious Beliefs and Emotional Baggage Review
The causes of Cynthia’s problems are simple. Yet, because they are unresolved and hidden in her subconscious, they manifest in ways she does not anticipate. (See Windows of Self: Faces We Show, Hide and Cannot See post.)
The Accident
Situation: Cynthia’s day started pretty well until the tea bag “accidentally” slipped from her fingers and stained her blouse.
Explanation: Throughout many lifetimes, Cynthia has been treated poorly by her family, friends and society. Her spiritual awareness was not well refined back then as it is now. She was unable to see in those lifetimes that outer events do not define who she is, her true abilities, or worth.
Subconscious Belief: For that reason, she accepted those limiting beliefs that her father, mother, and others said about her in those lifetimes. (And, they were merely repeating those same things told to them when they were children.)
Therefore, a belief system was created for Cynthia at a very young age in one of those lifetimes that she was not very smart, prone to accidents, and therefore unworthy of praise. A belief system that became encoded in her subconscious mind and recorded in her soul memory (also Akashic records), then became part of her Low Self’s identity.
Emotional Baggage: Sure enough, in that lifetime as well as future ones, her subconscious would continue to reinforce that belief by creating more “mistakes” and “accidents” that would amplify the limiting belief that she was very not smart, accident prone and unworthy of praise.
Each time an “accident” happened within one of Cynthia’s lifetimes, an energetic attachment (energetic software) was likely created that possessed all of the “programming” of her limiting beliefs.
As each energetic attachment was formed, they became threaded together vertically through the layers of emotional baggage. This created a group of linked and related energetic attachments that probably appeared to have been formed separately and be dissimilar. But as we can see, they were all spawned from one belief system that was created lifetimes ago, but are still with her now.
Critical Boss
Situation: Cynthia is late to work and has a boss that is critical of others, and demanding.
Explanation: First, let’s look at Cynthia’s boss. She is demanding and critical, just like Cynthia’s father. Cynthia’s unworthiness belief became the unconscious lens that led her to choose that job in the first place. Her subconscious helped filter her outer conscious awareness so that she would ignore other employment opportunities that had healthier working environments and better supervisors.
Next, she was late for work. This was a result of her subconscious belief (and emotional baggage) that she is accident prone, which always creates disruptions. That directly led into her being late for the meeting. Her unworthiness belief caused her to “forget” to have the report ready and copied the day before, which made her look bad in the eyes of both her boss and coworkers during the meeting that day.
Unhealthy Relationships
Situation: Cynthia chooses men that are not good for her, starting with her father.
Explanation: Her belief of being unworthy continues into Cynthia’s relationships. She subconsciously chooses men that reflect her past life experiences, earlier childhood, as well as her unworthiness subconscious belief and linked emotional baggage.
Summary
Cynthia’s childhood experiences described in this story stemmed from her past life belief system that she wasn’t very smart, prone to accidents, and therefore unworthy of praise.
She also chose to come into this life with a father that reflected and reinforced her sense of unworthiness.
Why is that?
Often, we choose families and childhood situations that will put a spotlight on our own issues. This creates a condition that hopefully causes us to work through the process of dealing with the root causes, rather than ignoring them.
Cynthia’s mother was not able to help her because she likely had the similar problems. She married Cynthia’s father because of her own issues. Unfortunately, she didn’t deal with them and Cynthia and her brother endured the results.
All of the situations in Cynthia’s life were outward reflections, or manifestations, of her subconscious beliefs and emotional baggage.
Outwardly, all these events probably appeared unrelated to her friends and coworkers. Yet, they were all spawned from a subconscious belief system that has created a considerable amount of emotional baggage (energetic attachments) over several lifetimes.
Although simplified, this scenario is one we see repeatedly in people’s lives.
If we are willing to understand how our subconscious beliefs and emotional baggage are formed and manifest in our lives, then we need look no further than our present beliefs, habits and self-image to see the causes.
The Pot of Gold at the Rainbow’s End
As we pursue our spiritual path, meditate, reflect and set our intentions to live from our true nature — our guides, High Self and the Divine (God) will shepherd us to identify and release our limiting beliefs and replace them with those of our High Self, our true nature.
A Meditation to Further Accelerate Your Spiritual Path
We encourage you to meet your true self and higher nature as you experience the Shifting Our Perspective guided meditation, as we leave our discordant world behind.
It guides each of us to see things from the vantage point of our High Self and the Divine. It then leads us to release our lower emotions that inhibit experiencing our true spiritual life.
We wish you Blessings and Light as you further explore your personal spiritual journey!
A Footnote for the Curious:
The subconscious processes three to four times more detail from our waking environment than our conscious mind. It can accurately perceive our situation, the nature of the people around us and the detailed features of our worldly environment — long before we are consciously aware of anything.
It is constantly plugged into every sight, sound, smell, and feeling that we are experiencing, including all of our memories. It also has access to our Life Plan stored in the etheric realm. It can see every opportunity to create “situations” in our life.
It then filters our perceptions, molds the interactions and events of our life to conform with our subconscious beliefs, emotional baggage, and our behaviors and identities, both positive and negative.
It can set us up for success or failure, in any given moment, long before we consciously even know what happened.
However, as mentioned earlier, things begin to change for the better when we choose to seek and follow our Higher Guidance.
