What do we really want in life?  It’s not always what we pursue.

In a leadership course from years ago, it talked about the characteristics of high-performing people and teams.  The study that produced the course focused on low, medium and high performing work centers, or teams, throughout the U.S. Navy.

They found six measurable dimensions of work center performance in their extensive research, which included esprit de corps, morale, teamwork, clarity and two others.

Clarity is the Key

Of the six, clarity was found to have the greatest impact on creating high-performing, empowered individuals and teams in any work environment, regardless of the type of job being done.

This is also true in our own lives.

Without clarity of understanding of what we truly want, we end up meandering from one daily task to another in our life; or from one “This is it!” to the next, each time hoping we have found the motherlode of fulfillment and happiness for ourselves.

It is challenging to find something if we are not crystal clear on what we are looking for.  It’s also challenging for the Universe to give us what we want when we keep changing our minds.

“X” Marks the Spot

Clarity puts a big X-Marks-the-Spot on our ideal life desires and goal(s).  It illuminates a path for us to follow and helps create self-defining guideposts in the process.  It spawns enthusiasm and purpose by allowing us to clearly see our part and our vital contribution to the end product, new process, or desired outcome.  In short, clarity not only shows us what we should do but helps us understand what’s in it for us.

So, what is it that we want?  Interestingly, it is not always what we initially thought it was.

Our Real Wants in Life May Be Something Else

When Joseph Campbell was interviewed back in late 1980s by Bill Moyers for a PBS six-part video series titled, “The Power of Myth,” he was asked if people were looking for the meaning of life?  Mr. Campbell said that he didn’t think people were looking for the meaning of life, because meaning is about the mind and our thinking. 

What he believed people were looking for was the experience of (being) feeling alive!  That full, permeating connection with life and living that brings joy, fulfillment, and bliss.  Joseph Campbell’s mantra was “Follow your Bliss,” which is truly an affair of the spiritual heart.

Soul’s High Path

When we find our bliss station, as he called it, “…the universe will open doors where there were only walls.”  Opportunities will appear for us in ways that won’t be available to others.  He called this the Soul’s High Adventure.  We call it the Soul’s High Path.

When we are on our Soul’s High Path, the one that fills and invigorates our inner being and makes our spiritual heart sing, we become naturally tuned with the energies of our true life.  Things will happen for us in ways that cannot happen for others.  When walking this path, it will feel like all of the unique and special things happening in our life were magically put there.

Clarity Revealed

Now, the clarity we spoke of earlier comes when we recognize that we often associate objects (things), worldly positions of authority, wealth, fame, etc., with the emotional and spiritual connections with which we emotionally imbue them, and desperately yearn to have.

That is, we can project upon these material objects and worldly positions of authority, emotional and spiritual states of bliss that we long to dwell in, all day and every day!

With this in mind, when we think of someday becoming the CEO of an important company or the president of a prestigious institution, are we actually desiring to hold that position, or are we really seeking to embody the fulfilling self-esteem, contentment, joy, and even love and adoration, that we imagine will be our constant and permanent companion, if only we held that respected position?

We believe the answer to that question is, yes.

Any salesperson can tell you; people don’t buy a Corvette because it’s cost effective and fuel efficient.  It’s not a thing of the mind, logical, or practical.

People often buy high-end cars, fervently pursue what they see as prominent careers and engage in elevated civic activities because of the wonderful emotional, spiritual and mental state they perceive will be theirs by owning such a vehicle, commanding such a position, or mingling among the elite.

It’s a form of projection onto an object, position, or situation of our own idealized state of being that we desire.  Interestingly, this beloved state of being is one that we already possess within ourselves. 

Know Your Why

With that said, those who pursue their dreams without being grounded in knowing their own inner reasons why they are pursuing them, may be in for a disappointing surprise when they finally achieve their life’s ambition.  Here’s why.

I have known very worldly-successful people over the years who have held enormously prestigious positions and achieved significant wealth. 

Many of them shared that the happiness, fulfillment and the wonderfully (elevated) self-esteem they imagined would be theirs by achieving their lifelong dream, in reality, had totally eluded them — while everyone around them thought they had it made.  Instead, all they ended up with was a very busy schedule, incredible stress and unhappy family lives (if they still had a family) and a dreary outlook on life.

Although they did achieve many notable things in their life, those things just weren’t the ones they most wanted or needed.  Of course, most of them outwardly told everyone else how happy and successful they were, not wanting to acknowledge they spent their life looking for outer success while ignoring their true desires.

Live Your Why

As we closely look at our dreams in life with an honest self-understanding of our own inner why, the what’s-in-it-for-us, it changes our motivations and approach in how we pursue them.

When we follow our worldly dreams with the inner connections of our true wants and needs, we can better choose an activity that fosters what we genuinely want in life, and from life.

When we live our “why”, we can select a dream career and life activities that will naturally build our self-identity, reinforce our sense of self-worth, nurture intimate friendships and relationships, and bring joy and contentment.  We do this through our recognition that OUTER activities are mere reflections of the inner things we seek through our own connection with our true being, the Divine (God), the Universe, and very importantly, everyone else who is also looking for the very same thing.

It is simple, but the mind, our Low Self and ego will insist that we are really seeking something else.

Listen to Your Heart, Live Your Adventure

Just listen to your spiritual heart so you may know what you really want, set your intentions to bring them into your life, then trust the Universe and the Divine, as they show you the higher path that awaits you — the path less traveled.

You may find that as your new direction unfolds before you, it will be important to keep in mind that it may be different than you expected, as you allow your spiritual heart’s true desires and the Universe and Divine to guide your life to the spiritual adventure you never knew was possible.